Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Fighting Independence

This morning I caved into the inevitable. I let my 8 year old son have a bit of independence.
*sigh*
As a parent you know this day is coming. You even want to prepare your kids for it (I mean who wants a 30 year old son still living at home playing video games? I don't unless that kid gets a huge paycheck for playing them. HA!) ...but a few months ago bam, like a bat hitting me in the head he asked if he could walk to school on his own.

NO WAY! my insides screamed out. But, calmly, I told him "We'll see" hoping desperately that he'd forget about this insane request.

HA! Forget? Me delirious, maybe? Maybe even floating on the clouds above reality. My kid DID NOT forget. In fact, he's asked a few other times. And amazingly, not everyday. He's been quite mature about the whole matter considering his age.

Then last night we were reading his Bible. Grandma bought him the Boys Bible: The Ultimate Manual for Christmas this year because he wanted a "real Bible, not one with pictures". (I should have seen this coming at Christmas, eh?) This great Bible has mini devos for boys in it! I love it!
Anyway, back to the last night. We just started reading in 1 Samuel 2:12-21; about Samuel. The mini devo was focused on v. 21 on how the boy Samuel grew up...then it says that boys ages 7-9 go through some big changes, like becoming more independent.

Bam, another bat...seriously need to hide those things or at least watch for them. But, really, it hit me. He is asking for some independence. I talked with my husband about it and we agreed that we'd let him walk part way by himself once in awhile...not regularly.

So, today we all put on our rain shoes, coats and opened our umbrellas and walked down the road. It was a walk way too short for me...I wasn't quite ready to watch him cross the intersection by himself. But, the light was green and off strutted the brown umbrella farther and farther away from my protective wing.
"Am I crazy for doing this?" "What if a scooter hits him?" "What if...what if...what if" were the echoes bouncing in my head. Then a quieter voice rose above the fears, "Dad's at the other side waiting a few short blocks away(in case you don't know, Dad's the principal at his school); and our Heavenly Father who cares so much more for that boy than I is walking right beside him." And to put the final touches of peace into place I saw another family just a few feet ahead of him.

Then I wondered what my boy would do after he crossed. Would he look back at Mom? Would he keep walking never looking back? Or would he run like a caged animal just released?

Then it happened. The brown umbrella crossed the road. It stopped and slowly turned. The umbrella revealed a boy with a huge smile on his face. A quick wave and the sign for "I love you" and then he walked off.
*sigh* Yes, he is growing up.

But, thank you Lord that he is not all grown up yet. And Lord, please allow this time in his life to last a bit longer. I'm not ready to release any more strings of independence yet. And one last request...could you give me a louder warning before I need to release another string? Those "hits" are not fun. =)

8 comments:

Heather Hammond said...

tears.....mine is up and coming too fast too...

MaDonna Maurer said...

Kindred spirits, I tell ya. And, why did you have to leave just when we connected? =) Hope you are doing well with your sis heading home!

A.L. Sonnichsen said...

Aw, why am I tearing up? I let my kids get out of the car and cross the street themselves to school in the morning. But it's hard when they forget to wave! I love it when they do remember, though. Sweet children -- it's cliche, but they do grow up WAY too quickly!

MaDonna Maurer said...

Amy, so true, so true. At times I'm like "Ah, will this season ever pass?" and other times I'm like, "Wait, did I miss something? Where did time go?"

Nevada said...

We're so lucky to have you as an example before us! We learn a lot from Uwe and you!!

Lisa and Laura said...

Oh, this post made me smile. What a bittersweet moment for a mother!

MaDonna Maurer said...

@Nevada...you are way to sweet!

@Lisa and Laura...so glad to bring a smile (or two). Thanks for stopping by! btw, love your site!

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